Pain – Page 10 – Navin's Poetry

Quarrel

These days I sit in silence
To avoid the quarrel
With those high sirens
To stop the violence
By not pointing the cold barrel
At my hot head to reduce the noise level

The imprint of my top shelf
Appears so dark from the shooting range
If you look closer, it’s in deep pain
My ground is covered with hot bullet shells
Ready to scream & layer my screen with thick red
The whole of me has uncountable dark spots, which make me spit lead

What have I become?
Why do I feel so frustrated?
Why is it still difficult to accept my new reality?
Why is my gun always loaded & pointing at me?
Why the feeling of pushing trigger to balance things?
Why am I wounded so badly?

Working hard to change my patterns
Life is on stake & is actually threatened
At times my body & mind are so drained
Difficult to find peace in that piece of frame
The feeling to drown in deep ocean to clean my stains
To heal my soul that has been bleeding since ages

Yeah, I can change all this with a blink
I’ve been working on this but sometimes patterns do stink
Building the physical & mental strength of my outer & inner skin
Trying to quit the quarrel & healing every particle of me
I’m burning in flames every single moment on this sacred journey
To form the new me from my ashes, the true being

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Related poem: Spinal con-fusion: a poem by a survivor (1)

Quarrel

Original poetry

These days I sit in silence
To avoid the quarrel
With those high sirens
To stop the violence
By not pointing the cold barrel
At my hot head to reduce the noise level

Related poem: Spinal con-fusion: a poem by a survivor (1)

Loving & Living

Original poetry

The flow of blood, that’s streaming
The flow of air, that’s breathing
The percussions of heart, that’s beating
The thoughts of someone, that feeling

Butterflies
Connecting
Dancing
Dreaming
Healing
Shining
Sighing
Singing
Smiling
LOVING

But then the lightning struck in its own beautiful form
The shields are up to protect & push away ones own reflection
Everything changes in that very moment, pure deflection
The lungs inflate & deflate heavily in this painful reaction

Crying
Emptiness
Longing
Missing
Restless
Sighing
Tearing
Thinking
Sadness
LIVING

It feels like the heart is burning in the ice cold furnace
Phrasing phase to face requires enormous courage
But this crazy love won’t disappear from the core & its blood surface
Love is the heart of this beautiful, light & dark universe

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Other: The Hidden Soul, Colors Say (1)

Loosing It

Original poetry

I can feel I’m about to loose it
I’m still shaking inside but I’m about to shake everything
The emotion in me I’m gonna screw it
I’m about to change from missing it to mess it
Don’t come near me covered in gasoline, I’m gonna burn it
I’m a ticking bomb, so I might fuse it

I can’t take it anymore, it’s so abusing
I feel so mental, it shouldn’t have ended like this
I don’t get a lot of things, it still amuses me
One thing is for sure, I’m lost coz it’s still so confusing
I got hit below the belt & I don’t deserve this
I’m totally at different level now, so don’t try to play with me

I never said or meant those things, coz it never came out of my mouth
It was only about this virus but it seems I’m that virus spreading in your body
It’s too late now, just don’t try to figure me out
Coz it’s me this time, who’s letting myself out
I’m already gone, I know I won’t be missed at all

The thoughts are speeding in my head with the bleeding images
I’m in the mood to do maximum damage
The ignition is on & I’m on the rampage
I’m moving on this crazy path of total & sickening rage
I’ll crush everything, which stands in my way
So start moving away from my track before it’s too late
I’m talking in my head with my own brain, it’s so deranged

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Recommendation: The Perceptions Square – The Black Iron (1)

Carnage

Original poetry

The clear sky is covered with dark & heavy clouds
The moon is shining while the clouds in heaven are flying around
The roaring sound from skies is throbbing my veins as it’s so loud
Soon the clouds will break loose heavy tears on this uneven & lonely ground

My heart is burning & eyes are leaking as I become restless
The water is reaching above my crazy head
It’s slowly choking me, I’m feeling very suffocated
I’m about to hit the panic button, the brain is loosing blood
Everything about me has changed, it’s about to flood

I feel stuck sometimes coz I simply can’t comprehend
Keep loosing & breaking things, when I hold them with my left hand
If I don’t focus on the things, the brain would forget & then I feel so frustrated
It seems like I’m still lacking in real acceptance of this sickened sickness

Everybody around me thinks that I’m a fighter with crazy amount of strength
But there are times when I’m weak & drained coz I can’t even hold my own stance
People do tell me the progress takes its time when it’s haemorrhage
But every now & then, I become crazy anxious & loose my patience
It’s my inner battle & I don’t expect anyone to understand

But all I know is, I’ll keep putting my effort
I’ll be working on me no matter what
I might crack but I will not break
And one day I’ll get the tactile sensation back

But my crazy mind does plays tricks with me, where I feel like the freaking beast
I’m trying to come out of such situations coz I’m becoming a total wreck
Every particle of my body is turning into an absolute carnage
The tiny explosions in me could change me into a handful of ashes

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More poetry: a poem named ‘Accidents’ (1). Forgotten happiness (2)

I Miss You – a Poem about Love

Love Poems, Original poetry, Poems about relationships

I miss looking at your beautiful face
I miss looking deep in your big eyes

I miss kissing your soft lips
I miss feeling your curvy body

I miss you crazily
I’m loosing my senses

Tears in my eyes every night & morning
It’s tearing me apart, you see

I keep longing for you
I need you by my side

I’m screaming out your name
But no one to respond to it

My brain is heavier now
My heart is simply crying for you

There’s nothing I can do
You’re a thousand miles away from me

I love you so much
I simply can’t hide it anymore

I keep picturing you
I can’t even deny this anymore

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Related: I tried to write you a poem about love (1). New Milk, a poem about love (2)

A Poem: Guiding Myself

Original poetry

I’m asking myself to guide me
So I remain focused
I need to push myself to higher level
So I don’t end up where I once was
I must discipline myself for betterment
So I build up the strength that I need

I must listen to my body’s physical & mental side
So I give enough time to myself without the guilty feeling
I must not be hard on myself
So I accept not all days are crazy cool

But I must heal the inside of me first
So I can treat the outside wounds
I must give myself the love & empathy
So I can feel the universe is love
I must meditate & practice mindfulness
So I can calm my nerves & learn to breathe again

But I could also choose to do simply nothing
But then I’ll leave the whole family in trauma, misery & pain
The choice is mine
If I wish to live & shine
Or end up into ashes & die

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Related: Where the mind is without fear (1). A poem about guiding myself and moving on. I survive (2)

A Poem: The Beautiful Souls & A Crazy Mind

Original poetry, Poems about relationships

The level of stress is too high
It doesn’t take a lot before everyone gets emotional & then the cry

This all started from the time back then
When I got hit by the bleeding in my damn brain

I see it every day how they react & act
It doesn’t take a whole lot to see them & myself crumble like a house of domino set

A small discomfort in him & he looses his cool
The whole house upside down the next moment coz he feels the world has turned against him & is so cruel

Now this other one is very sensitive & stressed out in his own way
He cries quite often these days & he keeps opposing me whatever I do or say

She’s trying her best to take the burden on her shoulders
But the threshold is crazy high, so she starts slowly to smoulder

She’s the other pillar of this beautiful home
She needs me coz it’s almost impossible to bear everything on her own

I’m going through a lot with my things as well
The feeling to isolate myself to find peace in that deep well

It’s not that I play insensitive or blind
I do sense things but I’m going kinda crazy in my own weird mind

I know if I fall apart once again
This sacred house will shatter into pieces, end of the game

So I try to calm my crazy mind & frozen nerves
It’s not easy though, I know how it is when body starts to burn

But no matter what, I give my words, I won’t give up
They’ve gone through a lot, it’s time to hit the switch, to brighten up

They need space, kisses & hugs from time to time
I’m here for them, it’s the end of this soulful ryhme

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Related: Shadorma poem: Family or solitude (1). A poem about love and relationships: unfair (2). See the beautiful souls and a crazy mind.

A poem about anxiety: Silenced Thoughts

Original poetry, Poems about anxiety, Poems about relationships

I’ve gone speechless in these dark nights
Not able to breathe as if I’m wearing my skin skin tight
Not able to strike words from my slick side
As if my lips are sealed with loctite
But thoughts are racing with top speed in my crazy mind
I’m clenching my jaws & my teeth then grind
My blood is burning as if I’m about to street fight
But I only see myself & my own eyes
Coz I’m the only one standing on both sides
My eyes are heavy & this scene appears blurry from my inside

Am I the only one sensing everything is wrong coz I didn’t understand anything at all?
Am I the one draining energy with my own thoughts?
Am I the one weakening the body by sucking the blood out?
Am I the only one feeling lonely & restless tonight?
Am I the only one trying to sleep hard but the heart is wondering around & falling apart?
Am I the only one soaked up in tears & feeling so cold in this dark night?
Why am I feeling all this & why are my demons laughing at me so loud?

It’s my anxiety, that’s hitting me hard
My energy is quite aggressive & strong
It’s affecting everyone the way I behave & talk
I’m grateful that I’ve been told, that all I need is to calm myself down
Be kind to others than to just point their faults & flaws
So I’m updating my third eye OS to fix my inside & out
How many more times do I need to die to get such wake up calls?

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You may also follow @navinspoetry_ on Instagram.

Related: Poems about living with anxiety (1). Attacked: a poem on anxiety (2). Silenced thoughts is one of my best anxiety poems.